Go Figure

February 1, 2024

In the '90s, way back before I owned my own business or had kids, my favorite character in my favorite novel gave me what turned out to be the simplest, and best, business AND parenting advice I ever received.

Simone, an uber-competent young woman, is working to clear her father of a crime he did not commit, and she asks for help from a cousin, Florine, who is perpetually bedridden with a variety of ailments. Florine, confused, asks how someone in her condition could possibly be of use.

Despite her misgivings, Simone was ready to explain. But something stopped her tongue. 'I had no plan, Florine... I was depending on you to figure something out.'

I was depending on you to figure something out.

Instead of being told what to do, Florine now owns the problem... and, as you can probably guess, is instrumental in saving the day.

Simone's words would echo in my head often when my kids were young. They'd be squabbling, or making mistakes, and I'd be tempted to jump in and fix things. But then the phrase something stopped her tongue would float into my mind, and so instead, I'd make myself say something like, "I'm sure you can figure this out... just let me know if you need help." A few years later, I realized this principle is also the best strategy for managing a business: Harnessing individual brains and expertise to own and solve problems—and communicating the respect each team member is due—is so much more effective than managing from above.

As far as I know, Kay Nolte Smith, the author of A Tale of the Wind, never owned a business or had kids. But here I am, decades after her death, applying her advice in contexts I'm sure she never imagined. Go figure.

—Deb